


a priori

by andchaos



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Human, Alternate Universe - No Powers, Drinking, F/M, Getting Together, MWPP Era, Marauders, Mild Language, Smoking
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-05-14
Updated: 2014-06-03
Packaged: 2018-01-24 17:22:54
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 12,428
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1613189
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/andchaos/pseuds/andchaos
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Lily Evans wakes up after a long drunken night in an unfamiliar house and with no memory of her activities. Petunia's angry, she's confused, and she only has her irritating neighbor James Potter to help her piece everything together.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Priori Incantatem

          Lily Evans didn’t fuck up. She was too busy studying for finals and worrying about university and trying to forget her loser ex-boyfriend and freaking out about her sister, who hated her and who was getting married to the biggest asshole Lily had ever met.

          Except sometimes the last two concerns collided and she didn’t get fucked up, she got off-her-ass _plastered_ at her sister’s bridal shower. And then she woke up in an unfamiliar house, with a headache that felt like Satan’s child trying to learn the drums against her skull, and no memory of last night past seven o’clock.

          She blinked awake in the sunlight, groaning and covering her eyes with her hand. It didn’t help much. She pushed herself into a seated position and scrunched her eyes shut, trying to resist the sudden light, but now that she was awake it was distinctly more difficult to ignore. She made another noise of protest and rubbed her eyes; they came away smeared with whatever eyeliner she may have had left after the party last night. She pushed herself to her feet, determined to find some coffee, and became acutely aware of two facts: one, she was no longer wearing a shirt, and two, she had absolutely no idea where she was.

          “Oh, shit,” she whispered, glancing around.

          The place was pristinely clean, but unfamiliar. The paneled wood on the floor, walls, and ceiling made the space look open, especially with the wall of windows letting in the spring sun. The only disturbance was a distinct trail of debris that led from the only open window to the couch, a mess that she attributed to herself. She had a vague recollection of crawling through a window into what she had assumed to be her own room, because even though she attended boarding school most of the year and she had been hammered, she had thought that she could find her way home in the dark. Evidently not.

          A cat darted into the room and wound itself around her legs. She thought it looked familiar, but then, she was barely at her parents’ house, so she had no idea to whom the cat belonged. It was a handsome orange tabby, sleek fur and well-groomed. She bent down to check its collar, hoping the name would spark a memory.

          “Magus,” she murmured, rubbing her thumb over the engraving on the collar. The name pulled on her memory, but she couldn’t place its owner. Now that she thought about it, she remembered tripping over a cat last night. For some reason she had only thought, _Wow, I don’t remember getting a kitten_ , instead of something coherent or logical like, _Wow, this probably isn’t my house_.

          “You’re a beautiful boy, aren’t you?” she continued anyway, reaching out to pet along his head. “I don’t suppose your master’s home?”

          He meowed plaintively when she withdrew her hand and stood again. She was still in the dark jeans she had been in last night, but other than that she wore only her bra and her left shoe. She kicked off the gladiator sandal and wandered into the next room, where she could see a refrigerator and where she hoped she might find coffee.

          She had just poured a cup of the already-made brew when someone behind her spoke.

          “Oh. You’ve finally woken up, have you?”

          She jumped and spun around, spilling hot coffee all down her bare stomach in the process. She yelped and grabbed a paper towel from the roll on the counter.

          “And then helped yourself to coffee and made a mess all on my floor,” the boy continued, leaning against the door jamb.

          Lily finished mopping herself off and finally looked up.

          “Potter,” she said blankly. And then, because she hadn’t embarrassed herself enough, she was too hungover and confused and tired to add anything but, “What are you doing here?”

          James Potter had moved in to the house next to hers after she had gone away to boarding school when she was eleven, but she still saw him sometimes in the summer. She remembered him being irritating and self-satisfied, but she didn’t remember when exactly he had gotten attractive. His parents had died in late December two years ago, and her family had made her come back for the ceremony. Even though she hadn’t really known the Potters, they all seemed nice enough—except for their obnoxious, pompous, relentless son, who asked her out to coffee every time he saw her. She supposed he owned their house himself now, but she didn’t know how he could afford it and she had assumed he’d moved somewhere smaller or at least less suburban, after his parents had died.

          “Well, Miss Evans,” he said, addressing her question, “This is my house, you see. I would ask you what _you_ are doing here, but I heard that extremely loud party last night when I was out in the yard having a cigarette. So I can fill in the blanks. Plus,” he added, now eying her up and down, and she crossed her arms over her chest and stomach in a vain attempt to hide herself, “I can’t say I complain about your current state of undress.”

          Lily backed up until she hit the counter.

          “I assume you didn’t do anything untoward?” she said, wrinkling her nose.

          “Unless you’re asking if I egged your house because I was insulted that I wasn’t invited to that little soiree—No. I wouldn’t.”

          “It was my sister’s bridal shower,” she said. “I thought I climbed into my own room, but—”

          “Apparently not,” he finished. He seemed remarkably unfazed for someone who had had a virtual stranger drunkenly break into his house and fall asleep on his couch. “Well, anyway, if you needed someone to help you piece together your shenanigans—”

          “I don’t do shenanigans,” she interrupted, smoothing her hair back into a high ponytail. She looked around the kitchen before turning her gaze to him, hoping she hit imperious and missing by a wide margin. “I should probably go. Sorry for the whole breaking and entering thing.”

          He followed her out into the living room and to the front door.

          “Don’t worry about it,” he said as she crossed the threshold. “You were nice enough to actually open the window. I have this horrible best mate who usually just breaks the glass when he’s smashed.”

          She gave a small laugh. “He sounds charming,” she said. She cleared her throat, keen to escape before she made an even bigger fool of herself. “Anyway…I’ll see you around.”

          He took one hand out of his pockets to give a small wave. “See you, Evans. Come back anytime.”

          She hurried down his front steps and heard the door shut behind her when she reached the pavement. She realized she forgot her sandal when both bare feet hit the cement, but she was too embarrassed to turn back. Luckily, the house in which she _meant_ to fall asleep was right next door.

          From what she could see over the gate, the backyard was a mess. She shuddered, thinking of how much work she would have to put in to clear that up, and walked up her own front steps. Her head still ached from drinking but she smiled a little when she saw the mess on the wall beside the front door, which looked suspiciously like egg yolk.

          The front door was open when she pushed on the handle, and when she stepped inside she headed straight for the kitchen, where the Ibuprofen was stored. She had barely swallowed the recommended two pills when someone else stormed into the kitchen, yanked the bottle from her hands, and threw it against the far wall. The pills all spilled out and scattered on the linoleum and Lily, Motrin not yet kicked in, winced at the loud noise.

          “What the fuck do you think you’re doing?” screamed Petunia, shoving at Lily’s shoulders so that she fell back against the counter. Lily cringed at her volume and covered her ears.

          “Tuney, please,” she said, reverting to the nickname she’d used as a child. “I’m really, really hungover and I have absolutely no idea what you’re yelling about.”

          “Well, that’s too bad!” she shouted. “I told you not to come back in here until you’d apologized, so get the _fuck_ out of my house!”

          “It’s my house too,” Lily protested.

          “Not until you fix what you did!”

          Lily inhaled and took her hands off her ears, bracing for the inevitable blowback. She balled her hands into fists and said, “I don’t…I don’t suppose you could tell me what it is that I did?”

          “Fuck you!” said Petunia. “You. Ruin. _Everything!_ Now make it up to Vernon and while you’re at it, resolve whatever you did to Fortescue because she’s been up in the bathroom crying since midnight and _I have to pee_!”

          She stormed away, but she only made it to the entrance to the kitchen before whirling around and jabbing a finger in Lily’s direction.

          “And you owe me four hundred pounds!” she added. She stomped off down the hall, shouting out, “Now get out of here until you fix everything!”

          Lily sighed. That entire conversation had been very loud, very angry, not headache-supported gibberish.

          She grabbed a bagel from on top of the fridge before she left the house. She chewed on half of it while she crossed the sidewalk and rang the doorbell on the huge, multi-storied house beside hers.

          “Back already?” asked James Potter as soon as he answered the door. He had changed out of his pajamas and into jeans and a plain black t-shirt, which all in all was very becoming on him.

          “Yes,” said Lily, pushing past him into his house. “I have a favor to ask.”

          He closed the door and sprawled out on his couch, looking up at her with a cocky smirk on his face. “Ask away.”

          The story burst out of her before she could check herself for tact or restraint.

          “Petunia’s really pissed at me and I have no idea what I did. I apparently managed to tick off her douchebag fiancé, my own best friend, and my sister all in one night. And I owe her money for something. Like, a lot of money.”

          He was silent for so long that she started to glare, even though she had meant to be nice enough that he’d be willing to help. When her look got deadly, he just smiled, like he was enjoying himself.

          “That’s technically not a question,” he pointed out.

          She rolled her eyes and huffed angrily. “Will you please help me figure out what happened?” she gritted out.

          “Depends,” he said, now studying his own fingernails. “What do I get in exchange?”

          She considered for a second. She caught the underlying suggestion, but she ignored his crudeness, which was pretty customary for him.

          “Half a bagel,” she said, thrusting the uneaten portion in his direction.

          He laughed and jumped to his feet, accepting the offering. He shoved half of it in his mouth in one go, and she stood waiting for him to finish eating. When he had, she said,

          “I don’t suppose I could borrow a shirt?”

          When he nodded, she followed him to his room. As they wound their way down the halls, up the staircases, and into the back of the house, she wondered again what one boy could possibly need with all the extra space. After his parents had gone, he had dismissed most of the wait staff; teenagers didn’t really care whether or not a house was spotless. She was tempted to find out, but most of the doors she passed were closed and she wasn’t up to snooping.

          The Ibuprofen kicked in somewhere between the living room and James’s bedroom, and she was too relieved at the lack of pain in her skull to be immediately concerned about James’s big fat obvious crush on her and how that coincided with her current location.

          She sat on his bed while he riffled through his dresser. His room was dark and messy, the walls a blood red, giving it a cramped feel despite the actual size. Clothes were scattered all over the carpet, but the king-sized scarlet-and-gold bed pushed against the far wall indicated that he generally slept alone. She shook off the thought, not sure why exactly she had considered it at all.

          “How’s a band t-shirt strike you?” he asked, crouched next to a bottom drawer.

          “Anything’s better than my underthings,” she said.

          He grinned like he disagreed but tossed her the clothing, and after she pulled it over her head, she went to stand in front of the mirror.

          “Who’re The Weird Sisters?” she asked, pulling on the hem of the tee to stretch it so that the logo was fully visible.

          “Indie rock band from Cardiff,” he said. He gestured to some of the posters on the walls, all of which depicted a group of eight men, pasty and greasy and exactly what Lily would have expected James to like, if she’d cared enough to wonder.

          “Did you get this one signed?” asked Lily, crossing the room and touching the bottom of a poster, right below a set of scrawled lines that may have been letters in names.

          “Yep,” he said happily, moving to stand next to her. “Myron Wagtail’s the lead singer, but Heathcote Barbary does rhythm guitar and everyone knows he’s the best.”

          She snorted and dropped her hand. “Yeah, everyone who’s heard of them. Which basically negates the majority of the human population.”

          He gaped at her in obvious offense. “Rude! Underground usually means underappreciated.”

          She raised her eyebrow. “Oh god, you’re one of _those_.”

          “Don’t be mean to me,” he said, hand over his heart in a valid simulation of sincere emotional injury. “D’you want me to help you or not?”

          She put her hands on her hips. “Fine, O Wise and Musically Knowledgeable One. Where do you propose we start?”

 


	2. Anapneo

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> everyone's smoking and Vernon's a twat

          James insisted that they begin by retracing her steps.

          “What are you, a comic from the funnies?” asked Lily, rolling her eyes.

          “Look, if it worked for Archie, it’ll work for us!”

          As he launched into an impassioned speech about why this was the greatest idea that he had ever concocted, she released her ponytail and wrapped the hair tie around the bunched-up edge of the t-shirt, shortening it to a more comfortable and more flattering length. Only when she was finished did she decide to cut him off.

          “Alright, alright!” she interrupted, reaching out to still one of the hands that he was still flailing around in an attempt to convey the exact degree of his intensity. “I’ll go along with your plan on two conditions.”

          “What’s that?” he asked. Despite the early hour, he reached into his jeans and pulled out a cigarette, lighting it with his other hand.

          “Three conditions,” she amended. “One, you agree not to smoke that inside.” She indicated his cigarette. “Two, you stop talking about your own brilliance. And three, you let me borrow some face soap.”

          He ashed his cigarette on a tray beside his bed, considering her. “You know that you’re really bossy, right?” he said, gesturing for her to follow him as he started back down the hall. “Cos I am brilliant. Super brilliant. No shame in reveling in it.” He stopped in front of a door that looked exactly like every other one in the corridor and pushed it open, revealing the bathroom inside. “Loo’s right here. Face wash is on the sink. Come downstairs when you’re done.”

          She was relieved that the bathroom, like his bedroom and most of the other rooms in the house besides the living room, was as messy as she expected a house run by an eighteen year old to be. After she washed her face clean, she found toothpaste in a cabinet and smeared some on her finger to use as a makeshift brush. Her hair was hopeless, but she wet her hands and ran them through the knotted strands to undo some of the frizz. Afterwards, she sighed, looking into the mirror, and decided that was as good as she was going to manage, for now.

          Getting downstairs wasn’t as simple as James had made it seem. The place was a never-ending labyrinth of hallways and staircases, but eventually she made it back to the first floor and found him in the kitchen. As soon as he saw her walk in, he jumped off the counter and ashed out the cigarette he had been smoking through the open window.

          “Fuck, I—this doesn’t count—”

          “You’re an idiot, Potter,” she said, brushing past him. “Now, where do we start?”

          The answer was apparently breakfast, as her half bagel evidently hadn’t soothed his stomach. He made them both bowls of cereal while she sat at the counter and watched him work. Only when he set the bowl down in front of her did she finally catch a glimpse of what he was feeding her, and she wrinkled her nose.

          “What?” he asked, catching sight of her expression. “Did I put too much in? Is it because the milk’s not one percent? Cos I promise, it’s still healthy—”

          “No, no, it’s fine,” said Lily, shooting for politeness. After all, he was letting her into his cabinets when realistically she had helped herself to enough of his things.

          She forced a smile and spooned some of the cereal into her mouth. He apparently bought it; after watching her worriedly for a few seconds, he relaxed in light of her faux pleasure and turned to his own meal.

          They ate in relative silence, James occasionally throwing a probing question or two her way, but she wasn’t feeling very open; she could still taste the sharp sting of alcohol in the back of her throat. As soon as the bowl was mostly empty, she claimed a churning stomach and pushed it away. James refused her help in cleaning up and offered her a jacket for their adventure, but she declined, actually feeling a little nauseous still. She felt a little better as soon as they made it out onto the sidewalk, the fresh air against her skin clearing her head and settling her stomach.

          “Where do you propose we start?” asked James.

          “Well, I would say the upstairs hallway, because last thing I remember I was downing shots with Alice outside my room,” she said, glancing up at the second floor of the house. “But Tuney said not to go back in ‘til I had fixed whatever it is I did, so…”

          He glanced at her. “If it were me, I’d flout that right away,” he pointed out, because she was staring at him beseechingly, hoping for advice. “But you don’t seem the type.”

          “I’m not,” she said, a little defensively, because his tone bordered on accusatory. “She may have become a right rat’s arse since I went off to school, and even more so since she met Vernon, but she’s still my sister.”

          “And call it a hunch, but I think you’re in the wrong here, Evans,” James added, shoving his hands into the leather jacket he’d acquired before they set out.

          She threw him a withering glare. “Exactly.”

          “Alright, so, Plan B,” he said, clapping his hands and rubbing them a little as though cold.

          “Plan B?” she asked, turning away as soon as she saw him lighting another cigarette. Now that they were outside, she couldn’t say anything, as per their deal.

          “We go into the heart of the storm,” he said, gesturing with the hand that held the cigarette between two fingers. She turned in the direction he was pointing.

          “Oh,” she said in a small voice. “I was kind of hoping never to have to go back there ever again, you know? Bit messy.” She wasn’t afraid of uncleanliness, but she didn’t want to wade through muck if she could avoid doing so. Especially messes that she had helped to make, and that she would invariably have to clean up.

          “Just a bit,” he laughed, striding forward.

          She rushed to catch up, and did, just as he got to the gate into her backyard and reached to undo the latch set high on the fence. He motioned her through first and then followed after, but was forced to stop before they even cleared the side of the house because Lily froze, assessing the damage to her once-clean yard. Broken glasses and bottles littered the grass, or were otherwise tipped over next to distinct stains on tablecloths and wood. Chairs and tables were upended and she saw a few popped balloons, not that she even remembered buying balloons for the party but that was beside the point.

          “I think I’m going to be sick,” she informed James.

          He laughed and grabbed her arm, pulling her deeper into the yard. “That’s just reactive memory. Psychosomatic,” he said. She wasn’t sure that was a real thing, but it sounded intelligent and he sounded confident. “Come on, let’s walk around, see if it triggers anything.”

          He led her through the debris, as she wasn’t yet capable of independent movement. They crossed more smashed bottles and plates and some stray utensils, and though she yanked her arm free at some point, snapping that she was perfectly capable of walking, thank you very much, he had to grab for her again when she caught sight of some very lewd phrases on the back fence written in smeared cake.

          “No wonder Petunia wanted to kill me,” she said. James stifled a laugh, still smoking nonchalantly.

          The nausea in the pit of her stomach grew with every step she took toward the back corner of the yard, so she continued toward there; something was tugging on the fringes of her memory.

           As they neared the rose bushes by the back fence, she paused again, dragging James to a stop by her side. She shook off his hand again. The sick, burning feeling in her stomach was growing again as she stared at the garden. She noticed that some of the grass over there looked wet with something that was not dew.

          “Oh, god,” she groaned, covering her face with her hands.

          “What?” asked James, sounding worried as he touched her wrist. “What is it? Did you remember something?”

          She nodded wordlessly. She was just sinking into the throes of a serious mental breakdown when she heard a faint groaning coming from beside the speaker system. Her head lifted from her hands as she turned around, head spinning.

          “Are those yours?” asked James as she started toward the mechanism, searching for a body.

          She wasn’t sure whether to be offended or not, because James seemed relatively rich and she couldn’t tell if this was condescension on her financial situation or just genuine curiosity.

          “No,” she said, deciding on wariness. “Petunia must have rented them.”

          She edged around the back of the speakers, on edge in case it was some crazy person about to attack her, but it was just a dark-haired boy, snuffling sleepy sounds against his arm.

          “Damn it,” she said, kicking him awake. “Oi, who the bloody hell are you?”

          He startled into consciousness and, upon seeing a very cross Lily Evans above him, scrambled to a seated position. He knocked his head against the speakers and groaned, clutching his skull and glaring up at her. When his gaze settled on her, however, he brightened considerably.

          “Hey, Lily! Oh, man, what _happened_ to you? I lost you after you puked all over that heavy bloke’s shoes,” he said, grinning up at her.

          Lily moaned again and smacked herself in the forehead, because the stranger had confirmed exactly what she’d been worried about.

          “What is it?” asked James from the other side of the speakers. “Who’s that, then?”

          “I think I vomited on Petunia’s fiancé,” said Lily, sinking to her knees.

          She heard him repress more laughter, but she was too upset at herself to be annoyed with him. She looked up at the boy sitting in front of her.

          “Who are you? What are you still doing here?” she asked, sitting back on her ankles.

          He thrust a hand out toward her, which she took without really thinking about it.

          “Frank Longbottom, pleased to meet you. Although, I suppose I already met you…but right, it’s great to meet you again when you’re sober enough to remember meeting me, so—”

          Before he could finish his thought or she could say anything to shut him up, James came around the back to join them and saw the boy, too.

          “Frank!” he said excitedly. Lily turned to look up at him. “What are you doing here?”

          “You know I can’t resist a party,” said Frank, taking the hand James offered him and getting pulled to his feet. “This absolutely gorgeous bird let me in, said everyone was too off it already to notice me. I don’t know what happened to her…”

          “Right, well,” said Lily distractedly, ignoring them completely as she pushed herself up without the hand James offered her, too. “Look, it’s great that Potter’s idiot friends could come to make this all worse, but if you don’t mind—”

          She pushed through them without finishing her thought, but the boys just fell into step behind her as she crossed back to the gate out to the street.

          “She’s on a serious damage control mission,” James explained behind her. “Apparently last night was not Miss Evans’s finest moment.”

          “Not from what I saw,” said Frank, sounding amused. Lily didn’t turn to check. “I must say she’s climbed her way to being one of my top favorite people, though. The girl’s absolutely wild.”

          “Is she?” said James, interested and skeptical. Lily rolled her eyes, glad that they couldn’t see the blush that crept up her cheeks.

          The trio had reached the front yard when Lily turned around, hands on her hips.

          “Right, look,” she began. “I’ve got to get to Vernon’s to apologize, so anyone that doesn’t want to come along can bugger off now.” She looked pointedly at Frank.

          “No way, this is fun,” he said, grinning.

          “I swore to help out such a fine lady in need,” said James, dropping his cigarette to the ground and crushing it beneath his beat-up old shoe. “Especially on such a perilous quest.”

          Lily gave them each another meaningful look. “Listen, boys—”

          A loud noise interrupted the end of her sentence, and they all whipped around toward the sound of breaking glass.

          “Uh, James,” said Lily, dropping her haughty tone, “I think someone’s breaking into your house.”

          “Shit,” muttered James. “Shit.”

          They all ran toward his place, racing up the front steps and squeezing through the front door. Lily still couldn’t navigate his house properly without getting lost a few times, so she was relieved when he dashed ahead and led her and Frank upstairs and to a door that she actually recognized. They all pushed each other through the door and fell into James’s bedroom, then came to a halt.

          A boy that Lily had never seen before was lying on James’s bed, apparently unfazed at their arrival, as he didn’t even look up. He was strikingly handsome, but everything from his laid-back posture to the set of his jaw made Lily think that he was a mite too arrogant for her taste. He was smoking what looked like one of James’s cigarettes and flipping through a magazine from the bedside table, and when they came in he flipped his black hair from his eyes and grinned at them, remarkably unabashed considering there was broken glass littering the floor from where he’d smashed in the window.

          “All right, Prongs?” he said. “I was wondering where you’d gone off to so early in the morning.”

          “Padfoot, Jesus,” said James, kicking some clothes aside and crossing to the bed. “I told you to stop cracking glass into my bedroom, mate. Besides, there was an open window downstairs.”

          “Where’s the challenge there?” said the boy. Then his eyes flicked past James and onto the other two. “Hey, Frank, what are you doing here?”

          “Crashed a party,” he said. Apparently Lily was the only one who didn’t know this boy lounging on James’s bed. She remembered James telling her about a best mate who smashed windows and broke into his house. Frank continued, “I’m surprised you didn’t come along, Sirius. You can scent a party two miles off, and I know that from experience. Besides, you’re usually at Potter’s ‘round midnight.”

          “I had a thing,” he said vaguely, waving his hand. Then his eyes alighted properly on Lily. She came further into the room as all three boys turned to look at her.

          “I’m Lily,” she said, more confidently than she felt. “Lily Evans.”

          “Sirius Black,” said the boy on the bed. Did he drawl everything he said? He watched her appraisingly for a second before something seemed to click, and he sat up, crushing the cigarette onto the ashtray beside the bed, dropping the magazine to the side, and swinging his legs off the bed.

          “Hold on,” he said slowly, getting to his feet. “ _Evans_?” He turned to James, who was glaring at him now. “ _The_ Lily Evans? Prongs, how’d you manage to get Evans into your _room_?”

          Lily looked between the pair of them, unsure what exactly was going on but with a sneaking suspicion nonetheless.

          “Have you been blabbing to your mates about me?” asked Lily, narrowing her eyes at James.

          “No!” James protested, but then Sirius was laughing and James’s face was burning red and the lie was worth nothing, really.

          “Go on then,” said Sirius, staring down at her again. “What’re you doing in this tosser’s house?”

          “Same thing as you, evidently,” said Lily, smiling a little at James’s discomfort. “Breaking and entering when I’m round the bend. Laying down on any comfortable surface.”

          “Sirius is always round the bend,” said Frank from where he’d sunk down onto the bed. “At least you’d been drinking.”

          Lily laughed at that, and even Sirius grinned at the good-natured ribbing.

          “Now, when you say ‘laying down’—”

          “I fell asleep, you idiot,” said Lily, laughing and shoving Sirius’s shoulder. “Didn’t even see Potter ‘til the next morning.”

          “Uh, that’s not technically true,” James broke in. They all turned around to look at him; Lily’s gaze was a little accusing. He noticed. “No, no! I swear, I’d never! I said I’d—alright, never mind. Point is, you wandered into the kitchen ‘round half past one, muttering about a sandwich.”

          Lily blushed deep crimson, but Sirius said, “Oh yeah? And did you, James? Did you make her a sandwich?”

          James also turned scarlet. Sirius and Frank were in stitches, falling over each other and making lewd comments that were all barely discernable through their continued hysterics. Lily and James glanced at each other every so often, both getting steadily redder in the face until finally Lily snapped,

          “Alright, that’s enough!” The others looked over at her, the occasional chuckle still falling from Frank’s and Sirius’s lips. “Listen. I need to get to my sister’s fiancé’s house _now_. Vernon’s a prick, so I can virtually guarantee this won’t be fun. Anyone who wants to come along for the ride is welcome to. Everyone else, clear out, because I want to get back into my place in time for bed and my sister’s kicked me out until I clean up my metaphorical mess.”

          “In that Vernon bloke’s case, I think it’s a physical mess,” said Frank, sending him and Sirius back into peals of laughter.

          “Padfoot, mate, you weren’t even there,” said James.

          Sirius quieted down and fidgeted a little between his feet. “Yeah, but…he said it funny,” he said. James rolled his eyes.

          After a small pause, James said, “Well, I’m already signed on to your service.” He nodded in Lily’s direction. “Sirius? Frank? We could use the comedy routine, even if you aren’t going to help.”

          “I’m always up for an adventure,” said Sirius, grinning between James and Lily.

          “Love me a post-drinking puzzle,” said Frank. “I’ve had a few myself. Plus I’m great at puzzles.” He lifted an eyebrow at Lily. “I’ll trade my services.”

          “For what?” she asked, crossing her arms.

          His smile turned marginally apologetic. “Your friend, with the purple chiffon dress…she was beautiful.”

          Lily narrowed her eyes. “I’m not _trading my friend_ —”

          “No, no!” shouted Frank, color flooding his face. “I just want…if you could maybe put in the good word—tell her I’m interested—she was really beautiful,” he finished lamely, staring at the floor.

          Lily watched him for a second, her gaze hard and assessing. When his repentant and embarrassed expression did not fade, she let her interrogator’s air drop.

          “Help me out and I’ll do you one better,” she said.

          Frank looked up. She caught his eye and they shared a small smile.

          “Alright then, we’re all on board,” James said, effectively interrupting their moment. All eyes turned to him. “Shall we get cracking then?”

 

Lily quickly discovered that toting along three teenage boys was very similar to babysitting. They were loud, they were whiney, and someone always had to pee.

          Sirius doubled back into James’s house twice before they even hit the sidewalk, returning with a jacket and a burrito respectively. He lectured them about the importance of fending off the cold and keeping a growing boy fed. James said he was tired of feeding and sheltering Sirius after three straight years of it, and Frank pointed out that he probably wasn’t growing anymore. Lily shook her head and quickened her step.

          Frank alternated between complaining about his bladder and mooning over Alice, whose name Lily supplied after his fifth time referring to her as the “ravishing girl in the violet dress.” Despite Sirius’s suggestions, he refused to urinate in an alleyway, although Lily wasn’t sure that attempting to use Vernon’s restroom would go over any better. Sirius also had a few suggestions regarding Alice, but she was determinedly not listening to those.

          James started off the walk with his friends, but a few minutes in he abandoned the pair of them and caught up to Lily, who was maintaining her gait a few paces ahead. He leaned down so that his quiet volume would carry, although she was relatively sure that she would be able to hear him regardless, as the street was fairly empty.

          “They’re all right, really,” said James, glancing over his shoulder. “I know they’re a bit rowdy, but they mean well. Especially Sirius. I mean, he can be a bit, er, crude. But—”

          “James,” Lily interrupted, laying her hand on his arm to quieten him. “It’s fine. I like them. They’re…amusing.”

          “Yeah?”

          “Yeah,” she confirmed, smiling a little at his hopeful expression. Then she elbowed him, teasingly. “You’re okay too you know,” she said. “A bit tall though. And you apologize too much.”

          “Sorry,” he said immediately, relaxing his posture back into a slouch. “I mean—sorry—oh, shit—”

          She stifled laughter against her palm. “I’m _joking_ , Potter,” she said, shoving him in the arm. “God, you’re impossible.”

          “Hey, lovebirds,” called Sirius from behind them. “D’you mind stopping flirting long enough to tell us lonely bachelors where we’re going?”

          James threw him a murderous look, but Lily turned around unfazed.

          “It’s just a few blocks, Black,” said Lily, walking backwards to face him as she spoke. “Don’t get your knickers in a twist because of a few minutes of physical exertion.”

          Frank laughed, but Sirius glowered at her.

          “Excuse me, Evans, but I am _very_ fit—”

          “Yeah, I’m sure that’s why you only pick up half-drunk sorority girls out late at the club,” she said.

          She turned back around before he could formulate a response, but she could hear him spluttering so she smirked to herself. James leaned over, ruffling through his hair with one hand.

          “How’d you know what type of girl he usually hooks up with?” he asked.

          “I know his type,” she whispered back, looking up at him. “All easy charm and street smarts, everything he says flirtatious. All too aware of all his good qualities.”

          He was quiet for a moment, leaning back into his own space. “Are you saying I’m not charming or any of those other things?”

          “Well, you’ve got the arrogance down,” she said straight-facedly. “And the never-ending stream of pick-up lines. But intelligent? I don’t know. You _do_ like The Weird Sisters.”

          “Hey!” he protested, but he was on the verge of laughter. “You haven’t even heard them play!”

          “You’re forgetting that I know everything,” said Lily.

          “You don’t know _everything_ ,” he said, crossing his arms.

          “Yes, I do,” she insisted. “Test me. Anything.”

          A thoughtful look clouded his face for a second, and then he opened his mouth, but before he could produce a piece of trivia, Frank spoke up from behind them.

          “Hey, Lily! I don’t know Vernon from Adam, but if I had to guess—that’d be his place, right?”

          Objectively, Lily could see what he meant. Petunia and Vernon had decided not to live together until after the ceremony, but most of her personal possessions were there and she was going to move in directly after they returned from their honeymoon. The house was small, enough room for two people and maybe a third if they decided to have a baby before they moved out of the area. The place was clean and structured, but _too_ clean and structured. A far cry from James’s house, which was relatively  well kept by whatever staff he hadn’t fired after his parents’ deaths, Vernon Dursley’s house looked like nobody lived there at all, but instead of being dilapidated and in disrepair, like most empty houses, this looked almost frozen in time. The lawn was cut impeccably short and even, the car in the driveway was washed and buffed to perfection, and even the paint on the outside walls were devoid of a chip or a scratch. Lily would have said that sort of precision and accuracy was impossible, if she’d never met Vernon Dursley or her sister. Although, far from wishing she could live there, that sort of perfection seemed more dreary and lonely than enviable.

          Frank gave a low whistle, and Sirius said, “Who is your almost brother-in-law, the pope?”

          “He thinks he’s something,” said Lily. She stood with her arms crossed as she gazed at the place, something dark and unsettled in her expression.

          James turned to her and laid a hand on her shoulder; she shook herself from her reverie and glanced at him, then nodded and stepped out from under his grip, up the front walk to the red door set against the woodwork. The others trailed behind her. She took a deep breath, then reached out, wrapped her hand around the plain brass knocker, and rapped it thrice against the door. She drew back unconsciously as someone called, “I’m coming!” from inside the house, and they all waited for the door to open.

          Vernon greeted them as expected: with a sneer, a growl, and a slight quivering of his embarrassing excuse for a mustache.

          “What the bloody hell are you lot doing here?” he asked, eying Lily up and down. “What d’you want, then? You bring along your ruffian friends to trash my house up?”

          “Why the hell would we want to trash your house?” asked James. He was eying Vernon with unbridled disgust and leaning as far back as he could without tipping over, as though physically repelled.

          He nodded at Lily. “Your lady friend there’s already proved that she _likes_ defiling everything she touches.”

          James grabbed her arm just as she reared it back. She probably wouldn’t punch Vernon in the face. Probably. But she couldn’t keep all of her instincts in check. Instead, Lily closed her eyes and took a deep breath. James’s grip on her arm relaxed, and she gritted her teeth to keep her gaze from narrowing.

          “Can I please talk to you?”

          Vernon hesitated. He glared around at all of them in turn, his lip curled up in an ugly sneer.

          “For Petunia?” she pressed when he didn’t answer.

          “I s’pose,” he said, still watching them suspiciously as he stood back so that they could file past him.

          When they were all huddled in his foyer, looking around with varying degrees of awkwardness, he shut the door and guided them into his sitting room. Lily supposed that in normal situations he might offer them a drink, but he didn’t seem inclined. He just took a chair by the fireplace, leaving them all to find seats on the loveseat and chaises facing him. Lily dropped into one of the chairs; James fell onto the couch, in the seat closest to her. Sirius sprawled out next to him so effectively as to crush him into the armrest, and Frank took the other chair. They all turned to look at either Lily or Vernon, both of whom were shifting in their seats, with discomfort and distaste, respectively.

          “Can I use your loo?” asked Frank after a moment.

          “No,” said Vernon.

          They all fell back to quiet.

          “Well?” Vernon prompted after another few beats of silence. “You had something to say to me?”

          “Yeah, I did,” said Lily. If he was going to look down his nose at her, she could do the same right back. “I wanted to apologize for my behavior last night. You are the groom, and it was wrong of me to...expel…the contents of my stomach. Onto your shoes.”

          “My boat shoes,” he added, glaring at her. “They were brand new boat shoes. A hundred pounds, at least.”

          “That’s not on,” said Frank suddenly. “There’s no way you put down _a hundred pounds_ on _shoes_ —”

          “What was the groom doing at the girls’ bachelorette party anyway?” Sirius cut in. “There’s something off about that—”

          “I don’t owe you any explanations!” said Vernon. “And it was a _bridal shower_ , you impertinent ape—”

          “That’s just a phrase the ladies use so we don’t think they’re up to something,” said Sirius. “But I know. I’ve been to your so-called bridal showers, and there’s all sorts of cakes and strippers—”

          _“Strippers?”_

          “There were _no_ strippers—” said Lily, dismayed and trying to get them all back on track. “Sirius, _shut up_ —”

          “Strippers?” Vernon repeated, horrified. “You imbecile! There’d better have been no scantily clad men at my fiancée’s place yesterday!”

          “Vernon, you were _there_ ,” said Lily, waving her hands imploringly. “You _know_ there weren’t any strippers!”

          “Aye, but there would’ve been if you’d have any say in it, wouldn’t there have?” he said. “You worthless little—”

          “Oi! Shut up about her!” James broke in, fists around the arm rest like he was prepared to get to his feet. “You don’t know the first thing about her!”

          “And I suppose you do?” said Vernon, turning his hard gaze on James instead. “You and your band of thieving, bullying scum—”

          “We are not bullies!” shouted Frank, at the same time that Sirius said, “Oh, like you’re one to talk!”

          Lily buried her head in her hands and just waited for them all to quiet down. When that failed, and she finally looked up, she saw Vernon on his feet.

          “I won’t have you lot in my house!” Vernon roared, red-faced and pointing toward the door. “Get out!”

          “Vernon, please,” said Lily, also jumping up. “Please, just listen—I’m trying to apologize—Petunia’s really broken up about all of this and I don’t want trouble—”

          “Oh, you don’t want trouble?” he repeated, in a horrible lofty tone that she supposed was supposed to be a facsimile of her voice. “No trouble, eh? Is that why you vomited fifty pounds worth of Cognac all over me?”

          “It wasn’t Cognac—and it was just your feet,” said Lily. She shook her muddled head; this was all coming out wrong. “Just hear me out, okay? I’m sorry, I’m sorry for ruining your fancy dress shoes and I’ll pay for everything—”

          “Too right you will,” he said, no longer shouting but as cutting as ever. “You’ll cough up all two hundred pounds and you’ll take your gang of ne’er-do-wells out of my house!”

          At that, everyone started up again.

          “You said it was one hundred pounds!” said Frank.

          “And she’s not giving a pathetic hag like you anything anyway!” said Sirius.

          “For the last time,” said James, “you’ve got no right to insult us, you greedy, insufferable, disgusting, deranged cow!”

          Silence fell. Lily covered her face with her hands again and groaned.

          “Get out of my house,” said Vernon lowly. His voice was shaking and he sounded like he was having difficulty forming sentences through his rage, and he was gripping his laughable excuse for a mustache like he wanted to tear chunks of it right off his face. “Get the _fuck_ out of my house! I don’t want to see any of you…you juvenile criminals…any of you! All of you! Out! Get out!”

          The boys all looked ready to snap again, but Lily took the lead before they could open their mouths.

          “We’re done here, boys,” she said, glowering magnificently at Vernon. “Come on. We’ve done all we can. We’re done.”

          Eyes never leaving Vernon, who was standing furious and red-faced in the middle of the living room, Lily led the others through to his entrance hall and held the door as they filed past her, heads together and muttering darkly. Vernon peered around the corner when she was the only one left.

          “I hope you’re happy,” she said. Her lip was curled up in an impressive sneer. “I hope you’re really happy, you disgusting waste of space.”

          With that, she slammed the door.

          She turned to the front yard to find the boys had made as much of a mess as they could; the lawn gnome was kicked over, she was pretty sure someone had peed on the charming little bench by the road, and they were still spitting on the walkway as she breezed past them. They looked up when she passed and rushed to catch up with her.

          “I’m sorry—I’m sorry I insulted your sister’s boyfriend,” said James as they reached the sidewalk. He swept his hair off his forehead and didn’t look very sorry at all.

          “Don’t worry about it,” said Lily, still engaged in a righteous stride whose pace matched her anger. “He was a right twat.”

          They fell into stunned silence behind her. She turned around, hands on her hips again.

          “What?” she asked.

          After a solid minute, Frank coughed, and Sirius shook his head in awe, and James said,

          “Evans…you’re amazing.”


	3. Aguamenti

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> the gang gets lunch

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> warnings for mentions of a past bad relationship (nothing explicit, but there's yelling involved and someone gets a bloody nose)

          Lily shook her head, red locks whipping across her face.

          “Shut up,” she said, but without heat.

          “So what’s our next move?” asked Sirius, leaning all his weight against Frank, who happened to be standing next to him.

          Lily shrugged. “Vernon was a bust, unfortunately. I wanted to make Petunia happy, but we’ll have to settle for ‘marginally less upset.’”

          “Does she have that setting?” asked James.

          Lily glared at him for a split second, but quickly dropped the fire. “Unconfirmed,” she sighed. James cocked a half-smile.

          After another pause, she clapped her hands together. “Alright, new plan. I can’t handle any more of my sister right now, so we’re going to see what’s up with my best friend. Volunteers?”

          They were all up for it, again, so Lily made an about-face and marched them up the street, James by her side, Sirius and Frank trailing behind again. Frank took smaller, stuttering steps; Sirius had a loping grace that apparently couldn’t be bothered to match the speed of James’s strutting stride.

          “What happened to your best friend again?” James asked as they turned the corner and Vernon’s place disappeared behind them.

          Lily sighed. “I don’t know,” she admitted, rubbing her temple irritably as though the memory was merely stuck and she could jangle it free from the outside. “I don’t remember.”

          James pressed his lips together like he was withholding a laugh.

          “What?” she asked, some of the bite slipping through into the word.

          He shook his head. “I just can’t imagine you drinking that much, _ever_ ,” he said, allowing the amused smile to grace his lips. “You’re all…proper, and stuff. I mean, not in a stuffy way. Or prim. Just not…”

          “Unrestrained?” she supplied dryly.

          “I was going to say—” He seemed to catch himself. His cheeks coloured. “I mean, yeah. Unrestrained. And all that.”

          “Well, I _am_ capable of enjoying myself,” she said. “Possibly overindulging in the decadence, though.” She made a face. “Honestly, my boyfriend and I just broke up a few weeks ago, but…well, before that, when we were still together, I asked him to be my date to this stupid party. I didn’t expect him to, y’know, _show up_ after everything that happened, because it was a pretty messy break-up and I’m not saying who—it was neither of us—but someone ended up with a bloody nose, so…I don’t know. He came anyway, probably just to be obnoxious.

          “There was a row. He didn’t…I asked him to leave. Not very politely, I might add. He sort of blew up after that, which is probably what started the bottle-smashing fiasco by the way. Eventually I managed to kick him out—he may have had a horrible temper and was generally a prat, but he was always a bit terrified of me, I think. After he left, I started thinking. Well, overthinking, which led to over-drinking. And then while I was _overthinking_ about Evan I just got on the subject of awful exes, and then I was upset that my sister was marrying Vernon—because, you know, he’s absolutely horrible—and then I was thinking about how tragic the future’s going to be, with my sister marrying that toad and after I probably fail my exams, I’ll end up working on the side of the road selling Mars Bars and trying not to seem like a pedo as I offer candy to children—”

          Obviously sensing that she was derailing magnificently, James grabbed her shoulder to stop her. Then his hand slid down to her elbow, then her wrist, where it lingered for a second, hesitant, before curling around her hand. Lily bit her lip and looked up at him. James smiled his wonderfully crooked smile and brushed a flyway piece of hair away from her face.

          “Lily, I can’t do anything about your old boyfriend. But I can tell you that he’s _gone_ now, and you’ll never have to deal with him again. And you know, the wedding will still happen, but if you want I can come and we can sit together and make fun of how awful Vernon looks in a suit, and then we can get hammered off that fancy-schmancy champagne they always offer at the reception and trash the place afterwards.”

          She flushed and looked away, smiling a little, but James tilted her face back toward him.

          “As for your exams, you’re going to ace those,” he said airily, leaning back into his own space. “Obviously. I’ve never met anyone as brilliant as you are.”

          Lily blinked, and as soon as her stomach stopped tumbling she extricated her hand from his. She took another moment to gather her thoughts, then said,

          “You’re right, of course. I _am_ brilliant.” Then she smirked, plucking at his leather jacket. “You’ll have to wear a tux to the wedding, though. The cummerbund will have to match my dress, and you’ll have to sit in my room for two whole hours beforehand and help me pick out earrings that match my shoes.”

          James laughed, his thrown back and everything. “I’ll pencil that in.”

          “And _no_ smoking before, during, or after the ceremony.”

          “After?”

          She shrugged. “I’m just awful, I suppose.”

          He reached into his pocket for his packet of cigarettes, flicking open the top of the pack. She watched as he placed the stick between his lips, but as soon as he brought the flame from the lighter toward it, she turned away.

          “I’ll just have to smoke while I can, then,” he said.

          “Not in my house,” she said as they all turned onto the Evans’s street.

          When they reached her front walk, Lily turned around. “Wait here for a moment, alright?” she said, making sure to turn her eyes to each of them so they knew that none of them were exempt from this address. Sirius in particular seemed to think that he was the exception to most rules. “Petunia’s…more volatile than usual. Let me speak to her first.”

          She turned towards them all one more time before she knocked on the door, mouthing, _“Stay there!”_ before her fist connected with wood.

          Petunia pulled open the door so that it was barely ajar, the sliding lock still intact on the other side. She glared at her sister through the space she made.

          “What?” she asked harshly. “Have you fixed it all up yet?”

          Lily chose to ignore that question. “I’ve come to speak with Alice,” she said instead. “She’s still upstairs, isn’t she?”

          “Yes,” said Petunia. She made no move to let Lily inside.

          “Could you maybe let me in so that I could speak with her?” Lily asked through gritted teeth. “I know you said I can’t come in, but I can’t exactly coax Alice from hiding from here, now can I?”

          Petunia glared at her for a full minute before she slammed the door shut. Lily looked over her shoulder, rolling her eyes at the boys assembled there, while Petunia unlocked the door. Lily gestured the others to her side, and quickly shoved them into the house as soon as it was open to them. She kicked the door shut and hurried up the stairs. Petunia’s distressed cry followed them to the second floor.

          “I don’t want your tramp friends in here!”

          “Oops!” said Lily, without any real feeling behind it. Sirius and Frank sniggered into their hands; James waited to see Lily’s own expression of, _“shit, oh well,”_ before he grinned, too.

          “I’ve said it once and I’ll say it again,” said James as they followed her halfway down the hall. “You’re amazing.”

          “I think you’ll find some differing opinions floating around the house right now,” said Lily.

          She led them to a stop outside the bathroom door, gesturing them quiet and leaning her ear to the wood. From the other side, she could hear a faint sniffling, following by the unmistakable but muffled sound of crying, the kind that used to be full-on sobbing but has fizzled slightly due to longevity. Lily bit her lip and rapped softly against the door. The crying immediately stifled.

          “Alice?” Lily called, hesitant in case _she_ was the cause of Alice’s tears. She really couldn’t remember. “Alice, please. It’s Lily. Please let me in—”

          The door swung open and Alice threw herself upon Lily, arms twined around her neck, face buried in her shoulder. Lily threw a startled look behind her but patted her friend gently on the back. She at least seemed to have directed her angst elsewhere, considering she was clinging to Lily as though she was the only piece of driftwood in a flood.

          “Have you been crying all night?” asked Lily.

          Alice sniffled against her shirt. “On and off,” she said, pulling back and wiping her eyes. She froze when she noticed the line of people behind Lily. “Who’s this?” she asked, sounding marginally less upset with her eyes fixed on Frank.

          “This is my neighbour, James Potter,” she said, wrapping an arm around Alice’s shoulders and gesturing to the boy with the flyaway hair. “He lives next door. And this is his best mate, Sirius Black. He’s, er…well anyway, this is Frank Longbottom.” Ignoring Sirius’s scandalized look, Lily squeezed Alice and added, “Boys, this is Alice Fortescue. She’s my best friend, so be nice.”

          Frank nodded dazedly and stepped forward to shake her hand, which she did. She even offered a wobbly smile.

          “Well, come on, let’s get you out of the loo,” said Lily, guiding Alice out of Frank’s grip and toward her bedroom.

          Sirius shut the door behind him when they were all inside and immediately flopped down on her bed. Frank remained beside the girls, while James proceeded to wander around Lily’s room with his mouth open, examining the posters on the pink walls and the organized clutter of her shelves.

          “My parents painted lilies on the bedposts, but I made them go over it when I was ten,” said Lily, settling down on the bed beside Alice, Sirius stretched out behind them. James gave a small chuckle and pulled out her desk chair, leaning back in it so that he was facing them all. Frank leaned against the dresser beside the door, his arms and ankles crossed. Lily removed her arm from Alice’s shoulders, but proceeded to clasp her hand tightly. “Want to tell us what happened, then?”

          Alice scraped a hand across her cheeks and inhaled shakily but deeply.

          “You’d gone,” Alice began, glancing at Lily at random intervals during her prolonged eye contact with Frank, who was watching her just as intently. “After we’d had a few, you went back downstairs to greet someone at the door and I lost track of you…I was downstairs making myself a snack, because I’d gotten a bit out of it and I didn’t like it, I felt all dizzy and wanted some carbs to get my head together. Me mum called, she rang to tell me that she knew I was at a party at yours but…” Tears bubbled back to her eyelids and she gulped down a few lungful’s of air before she composed herself to continue. “…b-but she wanted to let me know that I’d gotten a letter back from Cambridge...I would’ve waited ‘til I got back home, but I was excited. I asked her to open it for me, and…and…”

          “And it was a no go, huh?” said Sirius, frowning at her sympathetically.

          Alice nodded and more tears streaked down her cheeks.

          “You don’t understand!” she wailed. “That was my top choice university!”

          “Aw, Alice,” said Lily, pulling her into a proper hug. “I’m so sorry.”

          “Come on, Fortescue, cheer up,” said Frank, eyebrows pulled together. He sat down on her other side and took her free hand in his. “You’ll get into another university, a really, really good one. Cambridge’ll be sorry to miss you.”

          She scoffed. It sounded wet and weak through her tears. She looked up at him, her eyes dragging over their joined hands and traveling over his chest to his face. He offered a small smile.

          “Frank, isn’t it?” she said. He nodded. “Thank you.”

          “Anytime,” he said, sounding a little breathless.

          Lily had to turn away so that they wouldn’t see her lips pressed together, repressing a laugh. She withdrew her arms from around her friend and let James pull her to her feet, giving them space. Sirius seemed unaffected by the strange display in front of him. As they continued to stare at each other, he crossed his arms behind his head and gave a low, long wolf whistle.

          Alice jumped and pulled her hand free, blushing magnificently. Frank folded his hands on his lap and stared down at them, fidgeting in place. After a pregnant pause, Alice cleared her throat and wiped away the last remnants of tears from her cheeks. She drew in a deep breath and looked up at Lily.

          “Sorry for hogging your bathroom all night,” she said.

          “It’s no problem,” Lily assured her. “I wasn’t even here for most of the night. It was Petunia that went mad over it, but she’s always going mad over something.”

          That perked Alice right up. “Where were you all night?” she asked slyly.

          James smirked and elbowed her in the ribs; Sirius started to laugh. Lily twirled her finger around one of the strands of hair that was falling over her shoulder, looking everywhere but her best friend. Alice, meanwhile, was looking more and more amused and devious as Lily’s silence stretched.

          “Come on, Lils,” said Alice, now positively grinning. “Where’d you go after the party?”

          “Nowhere,” said Lily, too quickly. Sirius was in stitches on the bed.

          “Lily!”

          “I crashed in James’s living room, alright? Shit! You’re the worst person I’ve ever had the misfortune to meet.”

          “You _what_?” said Alice, now also dissolving into peals of laughter. “Oh my god! You broke in to Potter’s house?”

          “I didn’t smash the glass or anything! Not like _some_ people I could name,” she added, raising an eyebrow in Sirius’s direction. “I just…sort of…opened the unlatched one. And fell asleep on his couch.”

          “And demanded snacks, apparently,” Frank piped up.

          “Thanks, Longbottom,” said Lily, glaring at him.

          “Any time,” he said, smiling toothily at her.

          Petunia chose that moment to peer into the room. Her eyes fell immediately upon Alice; after berating her for awhile about improper lengths of time to spend in someone else’s bathroom, she demanded that they all leave. Apparently, Lily’s ban was back in play, and it extended to her friends.

          “I’m hungry,” said Sirius as soon as their feet hit the pavement. “Where can we get lunch?”

          “There’s a Greggs a few streets over,” said Lily, pointing in the opposite direction they took to get to Vernon’s house. “I used to go there all the time after drama camp.”

          “Really?” said Sirius. For a second, he looked like an excited dog, but then he frowned and turned to James. “Why is it you’ve never taken me to that place? All the times I’ve been hungry ‘round yours! I love it there!”

          “Because I’m not your fucking boyfriend, mate,” said James, rolling his eyes.

          “It’s your _duty_ as my _best friend_ —”

          “Alright, alright!” Lily broke in before Sirius could go on another one of his long-winded rants, all of which were generally corrupt at their foundations. “Yes, yes, Black, you’ve been very personally wronged. Can we go now?”

          “I can’t believe you’d side with him,” said James, crossing his arms. Lily shook her head exasperatedly.      

          “Er—actually, guys,” said Alice as they all began their trek, “I should get home. I haven’t called me mum since last night, and I didn’t exactly say I’d be staying over, yeah? She’ll be worried sick.”

          “But Alice,” said Lily. She detached from the group and pulled her friend off to the side. “If you go, I’ll be stuck here by myself with these pig-brained idiots. You’ve got to come along, please. I can’t be the only female here. I need the estrogenic support.”

          Alice’s expression twisted with sympathy and the slightest bit of irritation. “Lily—”

          “Please?” Lily put on her best begging face. “Please, please, _please_? As my best friend? And I’ll never ask for anything ever again—”

          Alice rolled her eyes and shook off Lily’s hand. “That’s not true at all,” she said, “but fine. _Just_ lunch. Then I’m going home.”

          Lily’s face split into a grin and she hugged her friend tightly. “You’re the best!”

          “I know,” said Alice, drawing away and leading Lily back to the others. “You owe me,” she added. “I won’t forget this ginormous guilt trip.”

          “I know you won’t,” said Lily.

          “Can we go now?” said Sirius, rubbing his stomach. “I’m so hungry it actually _hurts_.”

          “You’re pathetic,” said James, cuffing him on the arm.

          Sirius complained about that dig to his ego the whole walk there.

 

Greggs had a sprinkling of people when they arrived, some lounging at the tables outside, others that they could see through the window. The line was short, and Sirius ducked inside before everyone else, leaving them in the sun. Frank held the door for Alice, who went through giggling, but Lily beat James to it.

          “I’m supposed to be the gentleman,” he said, crossing his arms and frowning.

          “Well, I’m being a lady,” said Lily. “Are you going anytime soon?”

          James slouched over the threshold. Lily followed, muttering about his idiocy.

          They crowded in behind Sirius, Alice, and Frank in the line. Eventually the five of them edged their way to the front of the queue, ordered, and had just turned around to find a table when Sirius shouted out,

          “Remus!”

          They all turned around, following his gaze. He strode forward just as a brown-haired boy turned around, eyes immediately alighting upon Sirius. He looked both excited and resigned, which Lily supposed was the only way to regard Sirius.

          The cries of “Remus!” started from James and Frank, too, and they joined the other two at the table. Lily and Alice exchanged glances before pulling up seats next to the boys. Alice scooted her chair closer to Frank under the guise of pulling herself toward the table, and Lily pretended not to notice.

          “Girls,” said James, drawing their attention to him. “This is Remus Lupin. Moony, this is Lily Evans and Alice Fortescue.”

          Remus nodded at them, looking a little tired. Then he lit up, raising his eyebrows.

          “Lily Evans?” he repeated, and all at once James’s expression turned stormy. “ _The_ Lily Evans?”

          “Why do people keep saying it like that?” Lily inquired of thin air.

          “No reason,” said Remus, smirking now. Lily glared at him, but when no one came forward to answer her question, she shook her head, sighing, and rolled up her sleeves and dug into her sandwich instead.

          “So what have you lot been up to, then?” said Remus, turning his attention to his friends.

          “We’re on a memory hunt,” Frank said around a mouthful.

          “Evans has gone mad,” said Sirius.

          “I have _not_ ,” Lily protested, slamming her sandwich down and swallowing hard. “I got drunk,” she explained, turning to Remus. “Apparently I acted unwisely while I was out of sorts. We’re trying to fix everything up.”

          “Did a number on her sister’s psyche, too,” added Frank.

          “Yes, thank you,” said Lily tightly, throwing a glare his way.

          “That doesn’t sound like—” Remus started, but then he winced. “Sound, er, smart,” he finished, reaching down to rub his shin underneath the table and narrowing his eyes at James, who looked away too innocently.

          “Right, well,” said Lily slowly, looking between the two of them. “It was an accident.”

          “I know all about accidents,” said a new voice, and they all turned around. Lily turned her gaze downward, the owner of the voice shorter than expected. He was blond and plump, blushing and twisting his hands together. “I broke the urinal,” he added, climbing up into an empty seat and looking around the table. “I didn’t—Who are you?”

          “Lily and Alice,” said Sirius before anyone could speak. He waved his hand vaguely at them as he said their names, his attention fixated on the boy. “Go on, how the hell did you break the urinal?”

          “I don’t want to talk about it,” he said, reddening further and looking down.

          As they all laughed, Remus gestured at the new arrival and said to the girls, “This is Peter Pettigrew.”

          “He’s awkward, but he’s alright, really,” said James, grinning at Peter.

          “At least I don’t like girls for seven years before I get them to come out to lunch with me and my barmy friends,” Peter shot back.

          As James flushed, Sirius said, “Yeah, you _never_ get girls to come out with you.”

          “Dorcas almost said yes to a dance!” said Peter.

          “Yeah, _almost_.”

          “Wait, Dorcas?” said Lily. “Not Dorcas Meadowes?”

          “The very same,” said Remus, nodding slowly. “Why, d’you know her?”

          “Yeah, she lives on my floor. How do _you_ know her?”

          “You don’t go to the boys’ school down the street, do you?” asked Alice. “The one we have the dinner dances with?”

          “Yeah, they do,” said Frank. “Damn it, I miss _everything_.”

          “Aw, no you don’t!” said Sirius, while the other boys patted his arm sympathetically.

          “Yeah, we always invite you ‘round in the summer!”

          “But I miss all the shit you get up to when you’re not home,” he said. “I hate public school.”

          “Trust me,” said Sirius, shaking his head so that his hair flopped in his face. “You’d hate boarding school more. I wish I went to somewhere co-ed.”

          “Yeah, then you could slobber over girls more than once a month,” said Remus.

          “Like nobody sneaks out at night to meet up?” said Lily. “Trust me, if he had the ability to _get_ a girl, he’d have ample opportunity to slobber over her more than once a month.”

          As Sirius spluttered at the injustice of his friends’ words, Alice rubbed Frank’s arm and said, “We’re allowed visitors on weekends. You could come up and see the gang. Year’s almost over, but there’s time.”

          He looked over at her, a small smile tugging on his lips. “Yeah?”

          “Yeah,” she breathed.

          Lily had to look away again, feeling as though she were intruding upon something that should be exhibited in a less public setting. She turned to the others, who were back to ribbing Peter good-naturedly about messes he had already made during their few short days back on Easter break. Remus and Sirius had both finished their lunches, and Lily chewed on her own while she watched the four friends interact, feeling strangely peaceful.

          “I can’t eat another bite,” James said finally, stretching his arms above his head. Lily took a split second to track where his shirt rode up before flicking her eyes back to his face before anyone could notice. He turned to her and nodded at her empty container. “You done?”

          “Yes,” she said, pushing her chair back and climbing to her feet.

          The others were all finished, too, so they gathered their possessions, tossed their empty lunch containers, and jostled each other through the door out onto the sidewalk and the bright Saturday sun. Lily looped her arm through Alice’s as they walked, her face turned upwards to bask in the light and heat streaming across her skin.

          “You lot got any plans for the day?”

          At James’s voice, Lily opened her eyes and looked over at the group of friends. The others were considering his words.

          “I’m free all day, mate,” said Sirius, smiling widely. For some reason, the grin looked both cocky and mischievous; James certainly seemed able to read what Lily could not, as he glared over at his best friend.

          “Me too,” Remus volunteered, turning attention to him instead. “Well, until five. Peter and I were going to go to the library—”

          “The _library_?” James cut in. “Are you serious?”

          “No, I am,” said Sirius, with the air of a joke that never gets old.

          Peter let out a small guffaw while James threw a withering glance at his friend. Even Lily huffed a little in amusement, although she unhooked her arm from Alice’s and covered her mouth with her hand as soon as James looked over at her with wide eyes laced with betrayal.

          “Yes, and so am I,” said Remus with a wry smile. “Some of us actually enjoy reading.”

          “Yeah, but there’s no homework over break or anything,” said James, kicking at the ground. “Unless your fancy university for puffed-up geeks requires summer studies?”

          His words seemed unnecessarily cruel, but Lily could tell that no one took it offensively. Remus just shook his head wearily, evidently used to his friends’ jibes.

          “Ah yes,” he drawled. “I seem to have forgotten to feel guilty for actually harbouring some level of intelligence. Please, forgive me.”

          “Hey!” Sirius protested, while the others laughed. “We’re not stupid!”

          “Just lazy, then?”

          “And proud!” said James, crossing his arms and giving a hearty nod.

          “So you’re coming along to help solve the mystery of what I did last night?” asked Lily.

          “For awhile, yes,” said Remus.

          “And you, Peter?” she added, touching his arm.

          He seemed surprised, but gratified, to be invited along explicitly. “Of course. Always happy to help.”

          “Then let’s get cracking!” said James, elbowing her playfully. “Where to next, o drunken damsel of mine?”

          “I’m a lot of things, but not a damsel,” said Lily, flipping her hair over her shoulder. “And anyway, I’m not sure where to go…Petunia _did_ say I owed her quite a bit of money, but I don’t know why. Alice, what d’you—?”

          “Actually,” said Alice, twisting her hands. “I can’t come along. I really, really should get home now.”.

          “But—”

          “No, no, I told you. Lunch only!”

          “Alice, come on,” said Lily, grabbing her arm when she went to turn away. “I’ll be stuck all alone with this crowd.”

          “What’s wrong with this crowd?” shouted Sirius indignantly.

          “A lot of things, actually,” James pointed out.

          “I’m really, really sorry,” said Alice, shaking off Lily’s hand. “I really have to go though!”

          Lily sighed dramatically. “Fine. But I hope you know that I’ll never get over this betrayal.”

          Alice laughed. “Oh, yes, I’m sure this one instance of familial responsibility will cause you to throw away ten years of friendship forever.”

          Despite her determination to keep a straight face, Lily cracked a partial smile. “You’ll see,” she said.

          Alice bid her one last goodbye and turned to go. As Lily sighed and turned to the others, Frank broke away from them and called, “Oi, Fortescue! Wait up a second!”

          She turned around and waited for him to come to a halt by her side.

          “I’ll walk you home,” he said, breathless as he stopped beside her. He offered his arm, and she smiled a little before linking her own through his. The others remaining behind all stood together, watching them walk off arm in arm, a smile playing around each of their lips.   When they were about halfway down the street, James turned back to his friends and clapped his hands together, drawing their attention back to him.

          “So! Let’s go finish this puzzle, yeah?”

          With five of them left, Lily walked along with James and Remus instead of drawing ahead alone. Sirius and Peter trailed along a few steps behind, already arguing good-naturedly over something inconsequential. The sidewalk was just wide enough to fit all three of them, Lily near the road with James squashed in between her and Remus. And if sometimes her hand brushed his—and if sometimes that happened on every other step—well, no one was paying attention enough to notice.


End file.
